May Day! May Day!

1st May 2018

Monsoons hide my tears?
It's really blowy out there and you could be forgiven for thinking the weather is a result of everybody in the UK raging about the nonsense the government thinks we should hear. The country seems to be getting madder and badder, and we hear about it all on our many forms of media (be it social media or the Murdoch and Russian oligarch-owned dishrags) have a lot to answer for. A lot of people are angry for whatever reason – lying politicians and dying babies – and I really hope that someone takes a crop sprayer across the country with relaxants and 'chill' sprays. Its hard to focus on the important stuff when all this background noise is going on.
That said, my own preoccupations have suddenly switched and I realise I have been reading about this and that A to Z list celebrity having chosen to have bits of their bodies cut off without realising that is now the current thinking: that the precaution against developing cancer has shifted to cutting out the bits where cancer could develop. The fight against cancer is big business too as reconstructive surgery is now the outcome from discovering precancer cells early. Blood analysis chemistry and scanography mean people can hit this before it makes them poorly indeed.
I certainly hadn't anticipated being in this position and I do have strong support, but no one really knows how to react or feel.
Girlfriends and relative strangers have given me hugs and advice. Its been getting easier for my emotional lability to be kept in check but often it is unexpected.
I had several phone calls from different departments of my medical chart and tomorrow sees me going for an MRI before my notes are discussed on Wednesdays meeting which means Ill be going back again on Thursday and it may not involve the hour and a half on the bus as I am getting taken.
I know its a cliché but I never saw this coming. I never thought it would happen to me. Nobody wants this, honestly. An excuse to get breast surgery? No! A way of clearing my diary of extra stuff? Maybe not. It would make life a hell of a lot easier to make time for family and doing fun stuff together – making memories – rather than running around like a bluebottle never concentrating on the important stuff.
I have more bulbs to distribute and strawberries to plant – must stop wallowing!